We’ve been sitting on opposite sides of the couch since dinner was finished over two hours ago. The red screen illuminates our white walls with a red shine as he presses the play button on the “Are you still watching?” screen. I glance down at my phone and see a new text from Adam, he hardly notices.
It’s Thursday night and I have nothing to look forward to. The weekend is a time for me to sleep, catch up on the latest series and get fatter. He’s there the entire time but there’s also an elephant in the room. We’re talking, but we’re not really talking. His dark eyes look at me cautiously and I can’t tell what he’s thinking. Is he happy? Does he think I am? What are we doing? Is this what our life is going to be? He stretches his arm behind my back and pulls me in. It’s warm—he’s warm. And then we watch another episode of Mad Men. I’m happy in this moment.
This city has done a number on me. Coming here I knew I was beginning a journey that had the ability to build me up and tear me back down. I think the idea of that intrigued me, and I didn’t actually think anything bad would happen.
Brand None 